looking up

I’m often struck by the ironies of this industry. You can push for weeks or even months for something – an interview, a particular photo, a commission – which just won’t happen, for reasons out of your control. Then within days another opportunity can arise and all of a sudden everything happens easily, perhaps in the way you originally intended, or maybe in a way you could not have imagined. I’ve been having a stressful few weeks, with paid and personal projects not coming together easily and I’ve been struggling to manage expectations of what is possible – both my own and other people’s – something which has really undermined my confidence. But a few good things have happened over recent days – a commission I’ve been desperate to secure for months, an encounter with a fantastic Roma lady (above) who I very much hope to get to know better, and alternative plans which I hope will help my until-now rather disastrous MA Rethink project turn a corner over the coming week. I know my own state of mind has a huge impact on my work and I’ve been feeling pretty negative so far this year – which is in itself frustrating because I know this period is very precious. It doesn’t take much though for me to break out of this cycle – a friendly (or responsive, even) editor, a word of praise or encouragement, a nice email, an open-minded subject and, indeed, more light and better weather. If I’m able to mentally turn this corner then I’m sure things will start looking up.

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